Wonder Wednesday XXX

So, months ago, I saw the trailer for Batman XXX, a porn parody of the 60s Batman and was stunned by how high the production values appeared. If you haven't watched the trailer, here it is:


I couldn't believe how EXPENSIVE it looked. The costumes are fantastic... which is more than a tad ironic. I mean a REAL Batmobile?! And the sequence featuring it along with the animated titles are SLAVISH recreations of the way they were on the original! It's just SO impressive... I seriously want to see it although I'd probably fast forward through the dirty parts, ha ha! Yuck, I hope The Joker doesn't get naked! That's NO ONE'S fantasy! (Well... it probably is, but that person is a sick freak!) This studio followed Batman XXX up with Reno 911 XXX. Uhhhh... that is the least sexy prospect I have ever heard!
So anyway, I recently learned that there is also a Wonder Woman XXX. But looking at the box, I was surprised by how LOW quality it appeared. The costumes in Batman XXX look fantastic, but this Wonder Woman suit seems really phoned in. A plain gold headband instead of a pointed tiara with a red star on it? NO logo on her chest? No wristbands? Just so half-assed.... I couldn't believe that after doing so well with Batman that the same company would shit out a tired-ass Wonder Woman parody. Well, turns out they didn't! Some other company just jumped on their bandwagon and put this together. And failed!


That looks like SHIT!!! Even by PORN STANDARDS!
And now... there's a Justice League XXX! At least the costumes look a tad better!
This Wonder Woman actually looks really cute with her hair like that! It recalls her look on the Super Friends a bit. HOWEVER, the dudes are almost all effen UGLY! Ron Jeremy is playing The Penguin in it. No one needs to see Ron Jeremy naked. I have no idea how he got so successful in this industry. I saw his documentary movie and I still don't get it. I'd always assumed that he must have been better looking when he was younger... NOPE! He always looked like that!

Anyway, JLA XXX is proof that most of the watchers of (straight) porn don't pay any attention to the guys and it's all about the women. Superman is at least decent-looking and Aquaman is probably the best of the bunch, but that Green Lantern and Robin are complete FUGS!
Porn makers need to be more selective. Don't just let anyone that shows up be in your movies! I think it's harder getting a job at Target than getting into porn! Looking at them again, the two lead actors in Batman XXX are actually pretty good looking!

I'm strangely proud that Aquaman is the subject of porn but, well... this is clearly no Batman XXX, so I will probably never see it.