Halloween Temper Tantrum... Sorry!

First of all, everyone with a toddler, DRESS YOUR KID AS A GNOME FOR HALLOWEEN! DO!! IT!!! That is the cutest thing EVER! (HA HA!!! Baby with a beard!!!)

Sigh. I love Halloween. It's totally the funnest holiday! Yet, every year David does his god damn best to fucking fuck it up and this year is no exception. Last year, Christine invited us to a party and he waited until the day of... no scratch that, he waited until I had the shower running, about to get in to get ready, to inform me that he didn't want to go! Oh, but he was willing to drive me and come get me. Oh really? Can you please, drive me to a party where I won't know A SINGLE PERSON, except the person throwing it, who will of course not have any time to spend with me because they're busy THROWING A PARTY?! That sounds super swell! Sign me up! So... Halloween last year sucked ballz. I did NOTHING! On the funnest holiday! NU-THING!!!

But that has nothing on this year...
So there's this amazeballz graphic novel called The Walking Dead. No seriously, it is ri-dic-u-lous-ly awesome! I bought the first volume to read on a trip and as soon as I got home, I went to Borders and bought all the ones they had, except they didn't have volume 2, so I drove all the way to Kenwood to get it from Barnes & Noble. It is THAT good. Driving to Kenwood Good! So, I lent mine to Cathy and she of course LOVED it too! And now Dave has gotten on the train. So we're all LOVING this series and now AMC is making a TV show of it! So we've been going nutso since it was announced, then the trailer was leaked after it aired at ComicCon... someone filmed it with their phone and posted it and it was RIDICULOUSLY AWESOME even in low quality! While I was up in Michigan, Dave texted me the above image of the cast... FLAWLESS! So we were geeking out over it via text and such and decided we should have a viewing party when it debuted! I even bought a set of mini glow-in-the-dark zombies on Mackinaw Island to use as decorations. So we have this whole elaborate thing planned, right?

Then David Devereaux invites us to Palm Springs for like a week, including Halloween. Okay. Then AMC releases the official trailer for The Walking Dead which is the same trailer, just in focus and not jittery. Coming... Halloween night!!! Oh FUCK ME!!! Seriously?! WHY would they debut it Halloween night?! Don't most people have better things to do than watch TV on Halloween?! That's just stupid on AMC's part... BUT it RUINS all the plans I had for a viewing party!

So now, I'm pissed off that I won't get to experience the show with my friends who are equally pumped about it. I won't even get to see it, until days after they have! I even saved a few un-dead themed episodes of Adventure Time, which I figured we could use to pre-game! And we were going to make zombie themed snacks and everything! OUT. THE. WINDOW. I'll probably still do a party for like the second episode... but that's not the same! That's like coming in second in a beauty pageant!

Plus, and everyone is all "Oh poor you!" all sarcastic-like, because now I'm like, "I won't even be home for Halloween. I'll be in fucking Palm Springs." But that kinda blows, because like everyone there is rich, so I don't want to show up to some fancy pants party in some Target store-bought costume. Halloween costumes are THE flimsiest, most horrifically sewn, thinnest, all around WORST garments ever made. And since I'm so sour and bitter, I don't even have any IDEAS for costumes. Like I totally don't even want to GO! Seriously, I would forgo a trip to Palm Springs... IN FAVOR OF a TV show! I totally would! I would have a million times more fun watching an hour-long TV show with MY friends, than I will in a week with David's. I know this costume thing is going to come up and I seriously have NO opinion of concern for it. I don't want to wear a costume. I don't want to go. I just... DON'T CARE! Can I dress as someone in Cincinnati, watching a sure-to-be-wicked-awesome TV adaptation of a wicked-awesome comic with their friends? No? Well, then nothing!

Wonder Wednesday 08-04-10 Beautiful Monsters!

Last night, Cathy and I spent over an hour texting back and forth, gleefully over our newest TV obsession, Adventure Time on the Cartoon Network!
It follows the adventures of Jake the Dog and Finn the Human as they gallivant through a magical world that resembles Candy Land on heavy, heavy hallucinogens. I love how RACY it can be, like in one episode, Jake's body was turned into that of a stumpy fat human and through the whole episode, he kept fondling his man boobs! And in one episode, Finn says, "There was a lava giant in our front yard. He was soooooooo hot!" To which Jake suggestively replies, "Mmm hmmmm?!" And Finn is like, "No, I didn't mean in a sexy way!" Homo-erotic male taunting? On a cartoon?! For KIDS?! I love it!!!

Also, we both knew we recognized some of the voices (like George Takei as Ricardio!), especially Jake's! It was driving me nuts, not being able to figure it out, so I looked it and it was John DiMaggio a.k.a. Bender from Futurama! So obvious, listening to him now, as it's the EXACT SAME CHARACTER! (He also does the voice of Aquaman on The Brave & The Bold!)
So anyway, did anyone try downloading the songs I posted yesterday? Just wondering if that worked.

Okay, so a woman and her two daughters were checking out at the Electronics kiosk yesterday and she was writing a check... no really, people still do that!!!... and she asked if it was the first and she's written 7-_ and I said, "No, it's the third." And she said, "Oh, it's not 7 anymore is it?" and changed it to an 8. Then I said, "Yeah, summer's almost over." And then one of her daughters almost started crying. Ooops! Ha ha! I forgot how important summer is to kids. In my opinion, though, this summer's been a Sunuva Bitch! I don't think I have ever looked forward to snow and ice as much as I do now! My aunt and her stupid republican cohorts can suck Al Gore's dick for mocking global warming last winter! Inyaface!

My favorite part of working in Entertainment/Electronics is that it abuts Toys and they are currently redoing that entire department in preparation for Christmas. I'm so giddy at all the new toys, I'm practically vibrating the whole time as I see them putting up new colorful shelf liner and interactive displays and then stocking all the pretty, pretty boxes and packages! Eeeeeee!!!! They brought back Bratz! I thought those were dead and gone, but... is anything ever truly dead and gone in toys? They keep recycling the same concepts over and over. There's YET ANOTHER new version of Strawberry Shortcake. Once again, lame.

But the BEST new toys... MONSTER HIGH!
They're like Bratz but MONSTERS! They have a whole fixture and a display unit with all the dolls inside looking AWESOME!!!
My favorite is Draculara (with her pet bat, Count Fabulous!)! I love her Edwardian meets Slutty Goth outfit!

I can't decide if my second favorite is Lagoona Blue:Based on the Creature From The Black Lagoon... I love her pretty aquamarine skin and the spit curl in her hair! And I LOVE how she has a pet piranha in a fish-bowl purse!

Or, Frankie Stein:
I love her Bride of Frankenstein hair, brushed long and straight and the stitches and bolts and such. So hard to choose... I choose BOTH! Ha!
Cleo De Nile is the least monstrous, but I still love her! She's mostly covered with mummy wrappings, but with a slutty fabulous negligee top and African style rings around her neck! I am not so impressed with her boyfriend Deuce Gorgon. Deuce means Dookie! He's TOO skinny hipster... but to get Cleo, you have to buy them together. We shall see.
This is the first time the black girl is my least favorite. Clawdeen Wolf is a Werewolf character, but she comes across more as a WereCAT. I mean, I LIKE her, but not as much as the others. I'll probably still get them all! SO FABULOUS!
Not my collection... YET! Oh I can't WAIT! It took all my will power to NOT buy Draculara, yesterday! But we're having to budget this week on account of my not working for a week. We better not sell out before I get my grubby hands on all of them! Oh I could just pee my pants, I want them so bad!