Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Halloween Temper Tantrum... Sorry!

First of all, everyone with a toddler, DRESS YOUR KID AS A GNOME FOR HALLOWEEN! DO!! IT!!! That is the cutest thing EVER! (HA HA!!! Baby with a beard!!!)

Sigh. I love Halloween. It's totally the funnest holiday! Yet, every year David does his god damn best to fucking fuck it up and this year is no exception. Last year, Christine invited us to a party and he waited until the day of... no scratch that, he waited until I had the shower running, about to get in to get ready, to inform me that he didn't want to go! Oh, but he was willing to drive me and come get me. Oh really? Can you please, drive me to a party where I won't know A SINGLE PERSON, except the person throwing it, who will of course not have any time to spend with me because they're busy THROWING A PARTY?! That sounds super swell! Sign me up! So... Halloween last year sucked ballz. I did NOTHING! On the funnest holiday! NU-THING!!!

But that has nothing on this year...
So there's this amazeballz graphic novel called The Walking Dead. No seriously, it is ri-dic-u-lous-ly awesome! I bought the first volume to read on a trip and as soon as I got home, I went to Borders and bought all the ones they had, except they didn't have volume 2, so I drove all the way to Kenwood to get it from Barnes & Noble. It is THAT good. Driving to Kenwood Good! So, I lent mine to Cathy and she of course LOVED it too! And now Dave has gotten on the train. So we're all LOVING this series and now AMC is making a TV show of it! So we've been going nutso since it was announced, then the trailer was leaked after it aired at ComicCon... someone filmed it with their phone and posted it and it was RIDICULOUSLY AWESOME even in low quality! While I was up in Michigan, Dave texted me the above image of the cast... FLAWLESS! So we were geeking out over it via text and such and decided we should have a viewing party when it debuted! I even bought a set of mini glow-in-the-dark zombies on Mackinaw Island to use as decorations. So we have this whole elaborate thing planned, right?

Then David Devereaux invites us to Palm Springs for like a week, including Halloween. Okay. Then AMC releases the official trailer for The Walking Dead which is the same trailer, just in focus and not jittery. Coming... Halloween night!!! Oh FUCK ME!!! Seriously?! WHY would they debut it Halloween night?! Don't most people have better things to do than watch TV on Halloween?! That's just stupid on AMC's part... BUT it RUINS all the plans I had for a viewing party!

So now, I'm pissed off that I won't get to experience the show with my friends who are equally pumped about it. I won't even get to see it, until days after they have! I even saved a few un-dead themed episodes of Adventure Time, which I figured we could use to pre-game! And we were going to make zombie themed snacks and everything! OUT. THE. WINDOW. I'll probably still do a party for like the second episode... but that's not the same! That's like coming in second in a beauty pageant!

Plus, and everyone is all "Oh poor you!" all sarcastic-like, because now I'm like, "I won't even be home for Halloween. I'll be in fucking Palm Springs." But that kinda blows, because like everyone there is rich, so I don't want to show up to some fancy pants party in some Target store-bought costume. Halloween costumes are THE flimsiest, most horrifically sewn, thinnest, all around WORST garments ever made. And since I'm so sour and bitter, I don't even have any IDEAS for costumes. Like I totally don't even want to GO! Seriously, I would forgo a trip to Palm Springs... IN FAVOR OF a TV show! I totally would! I would have a million times more fun watching an hour-long TV show with MY friends, than I will in a week with David's. I know this costume thing is going to come up and I seriously have NO opinion of concern for it. I don't want to wear a costume. I don't want to go. I just... DON'T CARE! Can I dress as someone in Cincinnati, watching a sure-to-be-wicked-awesome TV adaptation of a wicked-awesome comic with their friends? No? Well, then nothing!


  1. You should wait until he is in the shower getting ready for the trip and tell him you don't want to go :D