Monday, September 3, 2012

The Extremely Late 'Dark Knight Rises' Reaction

Oh look a post with actual words and no pics of shirtless celebrities!  Wait, where ya going...?
Okay, so... it was good.  I know, right?  NO ONE had that reaction.  People consider these the best super hero movies ever.  I don't know that I can even consider them super hero movies!  Batman wears a mask, yes, but his suit is otherwise... like a real suit of body armor.  Like people actually have this.  SWAT teams and soldiers and such, right?  The entire movie... all three of them are like that.  Everything is just realistic.
 But comics aren't realistic.  That's the whole point.  Well, super hero comics anyway.  There are true crime comics and military comics and stuff... I don't read those, I read super hero comics.  Batman might just be human, but he fights Killer Croc and Clayface and super human creatures.  Everybody in these movies is just human, even Bane.  In the comics, Batman is in the Justice League, which has a base in outer space.  He travels through time and into different dimensions.  That's what made "Batman: The Brave & The Bold" so great!  They didn't shy away from every outrageous aspect of the character's history and universe.  The movies?  Nothing BUT shying away from the source material.
Case in point, the villains.  Ra's Al-Ghul?  Nothing like the comic character.  Bane?  Very little like the comic book character.  Catwoman?  Yes, very much like the comic book character, who like Batman is an ordinary human.  Now some of the characters are pretty accurate.  Alfred and Lucius Fox are great.  Commissioner Gordon is pretty accurate, but how annoying was that part where he finally "realized" Batman was Bruce Wayne?  Didn't he already know that?  Weren't there already clues that he knew?  Isn't it a given?  I didn't get that at all.
Who the hell is John Blake?  Screw that guy.  Same for Rachel in the previous movies, whoever she's played by.  That's another problem I have... they just make stuff up.  These movies aren't adaptations of the comics, they're inspired by the comics. 
Back to the realism thing, I've never liked the tanks they use in these movies.  They're realistic military type weapons, but... none of them was really a car.  They never used the word "Batmobile" in any of them.  Maybe that doesn't bother everyone.  I guess it makes more sense, because the idea of Batman sitting in traffic is kind of ridiculous.

Maybe I'm just old and crotchety.  I mean, the movies are good, but there's no wonder or fantasy in them.  I just don't see enough of the source material in them.  There's no way in hell this version of Batman would work in a Justice League movie.  It would be like throwing the 1960s Adam West Batman into this movie universe.  It just wouldn't fit.  It would make no sense.  So despite John Blake's actions at the end of this movie, I hope this is the last we see of this universe.
While on the subject, here my two cents on Green Lantern.  Hard reboot.  From scratch.  Bye Ryan Reynolds.  He wasn't awful or anything.  I didn't even dislike the movie as much as most people did.  But the movie has come and gone.  No one remembers it.  No one wants more.  It didn't even find a second life on home video.  It's just faded from memory.  So let's just let it go and start over.  Maybe even focus on a different Lantern.  John Stewart still resonates and worked excellently in "Justice League Unlimited." 

Hmmm, oh that? ^^^  Just thought something was missing from this post.

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