Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Tune In (and Out) Tuesday 05-18-10

I am very much looking forward to the release of Robyn's new album, Body Talk Part 1, next month.
I am very much NOT looking forward to Bitchtina's new album Bi-Tch-On-Ic (that's what it's called, right?), the week before. The two aren't really related, but I wanted to discuss them both so, there ya go. First the good, then the bad.

Robyn's last eponymous album was EXCELLENT! It was SO diverse! No song sounded like any other! Her lyrics are so clever and often hilarious, and just as often painfully poignant. It's definitely, unmistakeably pop, but edgy and cool at the same time. It received great reviews and I think it was moderately successful, but it certainly wasn't a huge crossover smash, which sadly isn't that shocking considering Americans love their shit music. But you can honestly hear her influences in other, more mainstream music.

Here are a few of the AMAZING gems from that last album.
Every Heartbeat:

Konichiwa Bitches:

Handle Me:


My FAVORITE, Be Mine!:

GOD, I love that song! The video was just meh, however.

Three tracks from Body Talk Part 1 have been released, but none has a real video yet.
Fembot (live performance):

None of Dem featuring Royksopp:

The third track, Dancehall, isn't posted at all. It fits its title, though.

I mean, it's poppy, it's electro, it's vaguely indie. Once again, what's not to love?

On the other hand, are you really trying to tell me Bitchtina's newest single, "Not Myself Tonight" ISN'T just a rehash of "Dirrty?!" Seriously? The lyrics are pretty much completely the same. How TIRED that she mentions making out with all the boys and girls. Oooo, scandalous... circa 1996! Also, who is she kidding? Not herself? Um, that's who she is! She's a giant ho! We already knew that. She established that YEEEEEAAAAARS ago!

And I am SO freakin' sick of her pushing this album by trying to act like it's so unique and different because it's so electronic. Um... EVERY DAMN SONG ON THE RADIO NOW IS ELECTRONIC! It's not new! If you really wanted to stand out, you should have released an acoustic album! I mean, I'm not slagging off on her talent. She has a supernatural voice, so she doesn't need the studio tweaking others do. She can sing over ANYTHING and it'll sound great. But she keeps acting like SHE'S the innovator. Like it was HER idea to make electronic music popular. Look, even if she did come up with the idea on her own, she has to realize that ALL these other songs have actually happened and the public has consumed them! Lady Gaga's had SIX number ones in the past couple of years! No amount of lip service is going to make it seem like Xtina's doing anything BUT jumping on Gaga's bandwagon.

Oh and that's another thing. We all know Christina is a giant CUNT. It's never been a secret, but she dismissed Lady Gaga as "The newcomer" and called her "fun to look at" in an interview recently. Really? You're going to act like someone that is a TRUE innovator, who HAS, in fact, changed the entire landscape of pop music is "the newcomer." Bitch, YOU'RE not even the first of YOUR kind! YOU were a Britney knock-off!!! Did you forget that?! First she was a Britney clone, except she could actually sing, THEN when that got old, she ripped off Pink! After Pink, another ORIGINAL, put out her Mizzundastood album with Linda Perry, oh guess who Bitchtina snatched up to write her next album? LINDA PERRY! Ugh!

AND to top it ALL off, don't dismiss Lady Gaga and then MAKE YOUR NEXT VIDEO LOOK EXACTLY LIKE HER BAD ROMANCE VIDEO!!! COPYCAT!!!


Ugh! Shut your FACE, Bitchtina! No wonder Perez took to calling you Clonetina! Face it girl, you're the Pepsi of pop music! Always a bridesmaid...

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