Tune-In Tuesday 11-23-10 Macy's Thanksgiving Parade Flashbacks

I will probably never have reason to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade like... ever... again... in my life, but there were a few years back in the 80s, when it kinda kicked ass in a weird way.

First, in 1985, there was a He-Man and She-Ra float. I love how Pat Sajak has absolutely no idea what the hell he's talking about when he introduces it. Then they do the... I dunno, performance? It makes no sense. The actors just kinda run around and pretend to fight one another. Except Moss Man who is just chillin' until Hordak attacks him. It's kinda lousy, but was uber-amazing when I was a kid.

But wait! There's more! In 1986, they released the tragic live action He-Man movie and followed up with this float... actually, I think it's the same float, but with added "Look Kids, New Toys!" characters. Warning, the video quality is horrible... AND this year, they added narration by Dolph Lundgren, which, in case you were wondering, is ALWAYS a terrible idea.


In 1987, Marvel Comics... ahem, Marvel Entertainment got in on the act with this kinda kick ass float, starring it's heroes and villains. I love how obscure some of them are... I mean, it kicks off with Dr. Strange!

No, you didn't imagine that. That was, in fact, Robocop! Marvel, at that time, was producing a Robocop comic and cartoon series! It wasn't in Marvel continuity, but screw that! He popped up anyway! Alongside Power Man (Luke Cage), Emma Frost (The White Queen) and a high-kicking Enchantress! But notice who was missing? Spider-Man! Odd!

I guess Marvel took 1988 off, but they returned in 1989. Although, apparently, all the heroes lost their belts in the year in between. Seriously, Daredevil is wearing a straight up body stocking and nothing else! This time, they felt the need to to add disco to the mix and Melba Moore, wearing a far crazier outfit than any of the Marvel characters', sings "Holding Out For A Hero" as the characters tussle. Um, HELLO?! DAZZLER?!?! Missed opportunity! Seriously, I'm sure Vickie Sue Robinson wasn't doing anything that morning. Just sayin'!

Um... "Wonder Woman?!" What a fucktard! Wrong company, dipshit!

Ahhhh... good times.